MY BALL AND CHAIN" by SoftTouch

18 photos

"Mmmmpphhwwaa (You can't do this to me! I have a lawyer!)

Two years I've been living with that man Jeff, and he's never around when I need him.

"Marvin honey, I'm home. Marvin?"

"Marvin what're you doing all tied up on the couch?"

"She's been keeping me and Betsy here company. Don't get any silly ideas, four-eyes!" Siad trhe burgler pointing his concealed item.

"Mmmpphhwwpphhaammm? MMMMM-mmmmuummmm!" (My Jeff, get an idea? That would be new. Where have you been? This maniac has had me tied up for an hour!)"

"Mmm-mmm mmffll ..." (I'm sorry Marvin. I just stopped off to shoot a couple of racks of pool with the guys, and-)

"You two XXXX it off! All of that mumbling's driving me nuts!"

"Mmm? Mmm mm!" (Driving you nuts? You try living with HIM for two years!)"

"Mmmmpphhuuummmmmmfffphffaa mmmmm! "(Oh yea? It's okay for you when you've got me out running all over town. Get the groceries, pick up the dry cleaning, don't forget the tickets, and get the car washed. It wouldn't hurt you to do a little running around. You might even lose a couple of pounds.)

"MMMPF!" (You promised you wouldn't talk about my weight challenge any more.)"

"Mppff? Mmmm mmm mmf!" (Weight challenge? Dude! You're just plain fat!)"

"I told you two to XXXX it off! Look, all I need is a place to stay for a couple of hours until the heat dies down. Do you think you can stop your bitching for that long?" How the hell can you two understand each other when you're both gagged, anyway?!"

"Mmm mmm mmm mm phffmm." (Mister, you don't know my Marvin. All he does any more is bitch.)

"That does it! You, over here. And you, way over there! Now shut up!"

"Mmm-mmm mmffaa mmm. Mmmppffmm? "(You ...you called me fat. How could you say something like that after all that we meant to each other?)"

"That does it! I told you two no mumbling, and that means no crying either! No, wait, I have a better idea."

"There! Now go ahead and mumble all you want!"

"Mmm-mm." (I'm sorry, Marvin.)"

"Mmmpphhmm. mmmmm "(You're always telling me that you're sorry, Jeff. And then you go and say something that's just as hateful.)

"Mmmff! "(I don't hate you Marvin. I love you, but sometimes you get under my skin.)

"Mmm."(I don't mean to, Jeff. )

"Mmmf (I know.)

"Mmmffll mmmm?" (Say, what happened to that maniac?)"

"MMM-ummmmf" (I think he left. Probably couldn't stand your bitching any more.)

"Mmmf!? Mmmffmmm mmm! (Oh yea? Well you can leave, too. See if I care!)

"Mmffl. Mmm-mmmf mmumm. (I can't right now. I'm tied up to a fat man.)

"MMM! MMMMM-mmmm-mmmfff-mmmffmma mmm!" (That does it, Jeff! I am so going to kick your ass! As soon as I get untied.)

THE END

 

Marvin played by Justin

Jeff played by Jason

Photography by Caitiff

 

 

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